Amy R. Buckley

0 Are You Man Enough? (Satirical- Guest Post By Nate Sparks)

My last two posts offer a humorous look at questions and inconsistencies that women and men face when practicing strict gender roles. This week it honors me to post a satirical piece by Nate Sparks. He digs into common theological arguments for men to “man up.” When pushed to logical ends, we see painful limits many men face while working out what it means to live in Christ. Sadly, the outcome is less than ideal in marriage and family relationships. Thankfully, in Scripture, the dance of our Triune God (Creator, Word, Spirit) is not a chain-of-command; it is possible for unique individuals to live in interdependent oneness (more on this in next week’s post).

There is a wealth of material available today, instructing Christian men how to achieve a godly masculinity. Church bookstores are full of materials on “biblical manhood.” Despite the wealth of resources available, the men of the Church simply cannot seem to figure it out. Our pews are full of sissy-boys and cowards. [1]

Since no one else seems able to stem the tide of “soft,” “weak” men being emasculated by the Feminist Agenda, it is apparent my opinion is what the Church is missing. Because I have years of experience leading and piloting men’s ministries, it is time I shared my vast wisdom with everyone else. I will outline below three critical things I am convinced every man in the Church MUST do to be a true man of God.

1. Be the boss of your wife.

According to the eternal word of God, the Bible, your wife needs a patriarch. You can’t love her by empowering her to overcome patriarchy. Patriarchy is the dominant cultural background of the Bible, and God NEVER calls his people to go against the dominant culture of their society.

God has placed deep within her feminine heart knowledge that she is a delicate princess. She wants to be your damsel in distress. In all your masculine glory, you must guide her into her greatest dreams, marriage and motherhood. In return, she will grant you the greatest gift any man can receive: full submission to your every sexual desire.

I realize this sounds backwards, but that’s because you’ve been spiritually castrated.

Because of her God-given feminine heart, your wife doesn’t want equal partnership. She wants strong male leadership, to be reminded that separate and subordinate roles don’t diminish her value. If she doesn’t desire this, it’s because she’s rejected God’s design, rejected the only true femininity.

We all know most Bible translations and scholars treat subjugation of women as evil, a systemic injustice. But, thankfully, after 2000 years of confusion, the ESV has officially arrived at the only inerrant and immutable translation of Scripture. … Continue Reading

0 How To Avoid the Teaching of Women- Confusion Rocks the World of Evangelical Men (Satirical, Part 2)

Part 2 of this satirical series explores the questions and confusions of evangelical men who are figuring out how to navigate gender-based roles. To read Part 1, go here . . .

A tidal wave of confusion is rocking the world of young evangelical men. Evidently, increasing numbers of men are questioning if gender-based roles aren’t as clear as some proclaim. Recent studies suggest that an onset of doubting occurs in males between the ages of 12 and 18. Social scientists suggest a possible link to the age of accountability observed by varying evangelical churches. “What this could mean,” one researcher explains, “is that a boy who reaches the age of ‘manhood,’ as determined by his community, is prone to confusions about what it means to exercise male leadership.”

Ralph, 12, sheds light on questions he faced after reaching the age of accountability. “After a baptism ceremony, the church threw me and my friends a reception. There were pink place settings for the girls and blue place settings for the boys. The pastor announced that the girls had become women and the boys had become men, and he commissioned us to practice our different roles.”

Ralph describes the confusions he suffered, in upcoming weeks, when finding out there is a big difference between stepping into manhood and having all the benefits of manhood. “I assumed that being a man meant that I wouldn’t have to take out the trash anymore when my mother asked. I also thought I could stay out as late as I wanted so long as my mother had set the curfew.”

When Ralph explained to his parents why he didn’t take out the trash or come home by 10 p.m. (as his mother had instructed), his parents rolled their eyes and grounded him for a week. In fact, Ralph experienced what social scientists call “the manhood matrix,” a profound crisis of identity when realizing that manhood doesn’t trump the wisdom and instructions of women including mothers, teachers, public officials, and other female authority figures.

Will, 17, reports a similar crisis. … Continue Reading

1 How To Avoid Teaching Men- Confusion Rocks the World Of Evangelical Women (Satirical, Part 1)

Writer’s Note

There are many wonderful male leaders in the body of Christ. This is true because they have deep and abiding relationships with Jesus (the living Word). God has gifted and called them. Maleness did not prequalify them for it; Jesus’ life, death and resurrection made it possible.

Jesus’s redeeming work is just as potent in women. And I firmly believe that he doesn’t confine himself to passive vocations (through females). After all, the Spirit blows where it pleases (John 3:8). And Genesis 2 describes the first woman as “ezer” (warrior-helper), the same word describing God when Israel desperately needed rescuing (16 out of 21 times in the Old Testament).

As an evangelical, I believe that Scripture can’t contradict itself (the big ideas of God’s intended meaning). Yet some who call themselves evangelicals take obscure passages out of context with confusing outcomes.

A somewhat recent article by Mary Kassian, posted by Desiring God, claims that the Bible offers “clear” instructions and boundaries prohibiting women from leading men. A girl is left wondering what to do with stories of strong women leaders reeling across the pages of the Bible. Miriam, Rahab, Deborah, Abigail, Ruth, Esther, Huldah, Naomi, the Proverbs 31 woman—All made judgment calls and acted to benefit God’s purposes. What about New Testament passages endorsing the ministry, teaching and leadership of women in partnership with men—Lydia, Dorcas, Priscilla, Tryphena, Euodia, Syntyche, Junia (among others)?

Though he could have specified which spiritual gifts are masculine versus feminine, Paul—an explicit writer and theologian—makes no such distinctions in the Greek.

Rather than plumbing further biblical and theological evidence, I’d like to take another approach. The following is satirical series (Part 1 & Part 2) ; it shows the logical outcomes of women and men navigating male leadership without mutuality. The instructions and boundaries are less than clear. More than confusing.

In the future, I will occasionally post satirical pieces (be forewarned).

Amy

How To Avoid Teaching Men- Confusion Rocks the World Of Evangelical Women (Satirical, Part 1)

In a profound about face, numbers of evangelical women are turning their backs on male-centered laws and leadership hierarchy. Evidently they are confused because gender-based roles aren’t as clear as some proclaim. … Continue Reading

0 Millennials Don’t Want Your Sex for Now. Here’s Why

Millennial attitudes and behaviors reflect more than stereotypical “hookup” culture. More than the latest research findings, it reflects the brokenness we all share as humans (Romans 3_23).And it points at profou

It’s not really about morality. (Published by RELEVANT)

Most of us prefer not to think of our parents’ sexual history. Of course we know the facts of life, and we’ll acknowledge what led to our existence. As a teenager, I avoided the subject. I knew my parents were of a generation known for free love and a sexual revolution.

Evidently the Boomers ditched the social conventions of their parents (the so-called “greatest generation”). Research shows that the number of sexual partners shifted substantially, from 2.16 for the Greatest Generation to 11.68 for the 1950s-born Boomers (controlled for age). Growing up in the wake of the sexual revolution, it’s no surprise that my generation (Gen X) carried on its own version of the sexual revolution.

Evangelicals such as my parents worried over the sexually permissive landscape that we were inheriting. Breakdown of families, higher rates of divorce, STDs, and the AIDs epidemic heightened their concerns. Not surprisingly, a purity movement emerged within many faith communities hoping the next generation would embrace sexual morality.

Many of us made purity vows, and youth group conversations revolved around burning questions: “How far is too far? What [sexual behavior] is and is not OK?” Some held to their vows. Others tested limits without actually having sex (defined as intercourse). And many rushed to the altar believing it better to marry than burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:9).

According to findings of the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health, more than half of those who took virginity pledges went on to have sex within three years; 88 percent of them had sex before marriage. Purity vows aside, my generation has danced with ambiguous definitions of sexual morality. On average, … Continue Reading

1 Mamas, Hold Your Children Tight- Guest Post By Ashley Grimm

Jesus is near the brokenhearted. Ashley graciously shares her story of loss and reminds us what matters most as parents.

As some of you know, I have gone through every mother’s worst fear. On June 2nd, I lost my youngest son in a horrible car accident. I was driving. I had pulled away from a gas station, checking each buckle, and I began to drive the curvy, mountainous road to my family’s house. My son was notorious for doing everything he could to unbuckle in the car (“The Flash doesn’t wear a seat belt, and I’m the Flash, mama”) We tried five point harness seats, boosters, I believe even zip ties at one point (probably not safe either) but he always viewed it as a superhero challenge. He was a superhero because he always succeeded.

On average, I would usually pull over three or four times on any given trip to firmly make him buckle up again. We were only five minutes out when a large rock rolled into my lane. I had three choices: try to straddle the rock, move to the oncoming lane which was a double line large curve with an angry river at the other side. Rock, head on collision, river. I chose the rock. I chose wrong. And yes, he had already unbuckled along with his 8 year old brother. (They were switching spots and I didn’t know.) The rock hit my axle, and sent us plummeting into the side of a cliff.

Our 13 passenger van rolled and my son was instantly gone. Our lives were instantly ripped apart. The little boy who had been my pride and joy was cruelly taken from me in a matter of seconds. I remember being … Continue Reading